mixologist

invented a new drink: the fuckittini. just add 2 ounces of vodka before 8 hours of a crappy job.

food court

dear tater tot,

i reviewed your case file for falling on the floor. unfortunately, i feel inclined to direct you to the case of lee v. five second rule.

i sentence you to my mouth for a term of no more than 3 chews.

sincerely,

judge delicious